Hockey Tryout Survival Kit
As a hockey mom you've undoubtedly had your hockey survival kit for years. It's probably consisted of the following essential items for a life in the rink:
Hoodie, sweatshirt, or coat depending on the season and a blanket for those cold aluminum bleachers.
Hockey tape (because you can literally use it for anything, screw duct tape)
Book to read or other project, because let's face it after a certain point you have seen all the drills.
Coffee cup/thermos/Starbuck or Tim Hortons. Caffeine separates the women from the girls during those 6am ice times.
Just the basics right? Sometimes you'll have a little first aid kit too (although we manage to lose ours about a month in to the season) or a bag full of goodies for a restless sibling.
But we aren't talking about a normal practice or game, we are talking tryouts. Tryouts require a whole different type of survival kit because this is it: Survivor, Fear Factor, The Real World, Survivorman and Naked and Afraid all wrapped up in one! Ok, maybe not Naked and Afraid...that would be cold not to mention awkward and illegal as hell. So here are some of my ideas on what to put in the hockey tryout survival kit:
Non-denominational sweatshirt or hoodie...particularly if you are trying out for a different team. Less awkward.
Flask...for coffee or hot chocolate of course..ahem!
Earplugs...to drown out other parents bitching, moaning and speculating.
Gag...to keep you from mumbling or engaging in the bitching, moaning and speculating.
A cattle prod...to reach out and touch the other goalie parents standing behind the net and critiquing your kid.
SWAT team shield...if the earplugs, gag and cattle prod fail this will separate you from the above mentioned parents. Or get one of those bulletproof shield things the Pope uses in motorcades. Better yet just go sit in the penalty box, you are better off.
A friend...to hold and squeeze hands with during crucial tryout moments.
Sense of humor...because you just can't take any of this seriously, it's all supposed to be fun, right?
Love and pride...for all the great things your player has done and will do.
Anything you can think of that needs to go in our tryout survival kit? Leave a comment!