Corporate Life vs Hockey Life
A lot of us work in a very corporate environment and it’s occurred to me recently how closely related the game of hockey and the corporate world are. Though your coworkers are generally going to have most of their teeth and aren’t as athletically inclined, there are definite similarities. To demonstrate I have come up with a glossary of common hockey terms and how they relate to a workplace.
- The moves your boss or an ambitious coworker make in an effort to deflate, degrade and ultimately keep you down.
- The time spent in any retreat, meeting or conference call where you are just counting down the minutes while trying to save your soul from utter annihilation at the hands of such words as “strategy” and “optimize”.
- Any action on your part which lands you in your boss’s office talking about your “performance” or "attitude".
- Anywhere you don’t want to be..the boss’s office, a conference room, your desk, human resources, you get the idea.
- Getting caught arriving to work late.
- When one sales person steals an account from another.
- Being put on the spot by a coworker in a meeting, usually for their gain. See also: getting thrown under the bus.
- The maneuver that is used to counter a trip (ie: putting the backstabbing coward in his/her place)
- Going above your coworker or boss's head. See also: tattling.
And while you won't catch most people shoving each other against the boards (or cubicle walls in this case) I can definitely see using the interference call and walking away. Sometimes words are so unnecessary.